I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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