He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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