never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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