i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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