how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
