we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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