Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
