I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
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Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10