Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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