Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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