it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
A bitchslap is in order.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
