I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
