The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I'm like, not good at living.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.