just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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