9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
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He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
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You made out with two different species that night
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year