Texts From Last Night

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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.

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  (770): I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges. http://tfl.nu/kn7k
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  (453): View more from

  apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.

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  (453): apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it. http://tfl.nu/3val
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.

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  (412): Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet. http://tfl.nu/977n
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza

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  (513): you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza http://tfl.nu/lm16
  Replies (7) Good night (3459) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?

  (1-586): View more from Michigan

  You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.

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  (586): You do realize it's a Tuesday, right? (1-586): You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life. http://tfl.nu/em8w
  Replies (22) Good night (7783) Bad night (615)
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  (631): View more from New York

  It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.

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  (631): It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom. http://tfl.nu/aix7
  Replies (48) Good night (6253) Bad night (1698)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.

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  (412): One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging. http://tfl.nu/rajk
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother

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  (319): Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother http://tfl.nu/j9lt
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  (409): View more from Texas

  he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out

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  (409): he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out http://tfl.nu/o406
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.

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  (580): You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose. http://tfl.nu/41p8
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  (530): View more from California

  Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.

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  (530): Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking. http://tfl.nu/izw9
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.

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  (440): im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know. http://tfl.nu/c5k4
  Replies (11) Good night (1994) Bad night (294)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.

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  (318): I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world. http://tfl.nu/vb5k
  Replies (4) Good night (994) Bad night (383)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry

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  (972): we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry http://tfl.nu/ax9j
  Replies (8) Good night (411) Bad night (2043) Order T-Shirt
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.

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  (712): ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was. http://tfl.nu/plh1
  Replies (3) Good night (333) Bad night (972) Order T-Shirt

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