Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.