He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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