so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
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i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
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The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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