My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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