Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
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