you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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