ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
