I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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