Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize