Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
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he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
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I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Just puked most of my soul out..
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