Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.

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  (309): $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively. http://tfl.nu/sa2o
  Replies (6) Good night (1315) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  i just google imaged poop.

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  (865): i just google imaged poop. http://tfl.nu/6d8g
  Replies (17) Good night (707) Bad night (2718)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin

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  (802): i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin http://tfl.nu/0a0z
  Replies (14) Good night (948) Bad night (2157)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.

  (1-916): View more from California

  That's why you should quit smoking.

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  (916): It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here. (1-916): That's why you should quit smoking. http://tfl.nu/xt8p
  Replies (3) Good night (595) Bad night (2062)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts

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  (337): thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts http://tfl.nu/kmf7
  Replies (16) Good night (715) Bad night (3338)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed

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  (571): I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed http://tfl.nu/twel
  Replies (24) Good night (3657) Bad night (1865)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me

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  (570): i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me http://tfl.nu/vizy
  Replies (38) Good night (6083) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?

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  (315): You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery? http://tfl.nu/9jay
  Replies (42) Good night (5621) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever

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  (314): so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever http://tfl.nu/0876
  Replies (18) Good night (3041) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.

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  (814): Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader. http://tfl.nu/y8oj
  Replies (62) Good night (6993) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..

  (256): View more from Alabama

  everythings easier when your wearing a toga.

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  (205): Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga.. (256): everythings easier when your wearing a toga. http://tfl.nu/a4vc
  Replies (22) Good night (7263) Bad night (980)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.

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  (920): Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage. http://tfl.nu/b73b
  Replies (5) Good night (2050) Bad night (535)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.

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  (217): Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again. http://tfl.nu/k53k
  Replies (9) Good night (1423) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  He better not be in your backpack

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  (707): He better not be in your backpack http://tfl.nu/rf3m
  Replies (6) Good night (777) Bad night (370)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao

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  (201): For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao http://tfl.nu/eyan
  Replies (7) Good night (807) Bad night (405)

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