Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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