as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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