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I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
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