thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Is it because I queefed?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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