you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Ketchup is God's man juice
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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