he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.