The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.