So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.