So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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