Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
