I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.