We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.