miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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