Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
