We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize