im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize