She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I wish my penis had an off switch
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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