You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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