just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
