Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize