I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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