bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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