is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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