We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
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Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
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ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.